Hey lovely! We all go through it! Friendship is hard.
This past year has taught me a lot about myself when it comes to friendship, and it has taught me a lot about other people.
Although I stand by what I have written here, please take what I say with a grain of salt because there really is no perfect formula.
Whether you are flourishing in friendship or struggling through it, let me affirm some truth for you.
In friendship, just because they (or you) have to walk away, doesn’t mean you are a bad friend.
Now don’t get me wrong here; you aren’t perfect…ouch sorry.
The reality is we all are crappy friends sometimes, and we always have to be willing to grow from it.
Something my mom taught me many years ago was that friendship is seasonal.
People come in and out of your life when you need them most, and sometimes that means forever-friendship, but more often, it’s for much shorter seasons.
This can happen naturally over time, or it can end with a sharp break.
That feeling will always sting, but giving people grace when they are ready to move on to something new is such a rich experience.
Forgiveness, kindness, and understanding are essential here. You want to remember your friends, kindly and sweetly, and sometimes that means letting them go.
It does not mean you don’t matter. It does not mean you are not valuable. It does not mean you are a bad friend.
Cover those lies with truths. You are growing. You sometimes have to walk away, as well. Just because you aren’t spending every week together or sending each other daily memes, does not mean you don’t matter to each other.
You are loved even in your hard season, sis.
Some days you are a kick-ass friend.
A lot of days you serve without expectation, you uplift your pals, and actually show up.
Those are such sweet times. Hold on to those times.
Because just when you think you are doing life so well, you might find yourself sobbing on the bathroom floor.
You might be heartbroken, you might be going through a season of rocky mental health, and sometimes you just can’t quite figure out why you don’t have it all figured out.
I want you to hear me, really listen to me, when I say, even when you can’t be the best friend for a while, you are still loved.
There are more people in this world, INCLUDING ME, that value you so much more than you think they do. There is a creator who designed you with value and purpose, and they hold you in those moments.
Even when you feel far from that truth, it doesn’t make it a lie.
The people who will sit on the floor with you and lift your chin, dry your tears, and go to bed praying for you are the ones you need to hold dear to you.
They will be the ones you will want to celebrate with when you start to dance through life again!
Be the type of friend you would want to be friends with.
This one sounds a little cliche, but things are often repeated because they hold weight.
You want your friends to be giving, kind, present, and fun, but remember serving and giving reaps so much more than receiving.
This week I want you to identify just a few people who have blessed you through your hard days and crazy life changes.
Identify them and then write down a few ways this week that you can love them well. Some of my absolute favorite ways of doing this are through random text encouragements, $5 Venmo so they can treat themselves, or send them a song that reminds you of them.
Honestly, just making sure they know that you are thinking about them goes so far.
You may find yourself wishing other people did this for you after a while, but
I promise if you stay consistent in serving and loving well, the people you need the most will show up. The universe just has a way of doing that for us.
Now go out there and remember you are valuable, friendships are hard, and life is worth living!
